Memorial services can often look the same as a funeral – and they have more in common than they are different. Each is a ceremony, and a gathering of people who share a common loss. One is more rooted in tradition (a funeral), while the other is the result of recent changes in social values and ideals.
For some people, the more traditional funeral rituals have either become too impersonal or people have an image of an event that is too somber. And as the choice for cremation has increased over the years, holding a memorial service rather than a traditional funeral has also made this type of service more popular.
Unlike a traditional funeral, a memorial service is a ceremony that takes place after the body has been buried or cremated. If cremation has taken place, the urn with the cremated remains may be present. Memorial services provide for more flexibility since they are not tied to a specific time or place, and can be held weeks or even months after the death. A memorial service can be held in any location – a church, the funeral home or another location of the family’s choosing.
Similar to a traditional funeral, there is usually a structure to the memorial service, although the elements may be more personalized and secular, depending on the family’s wishes. The memorial service may be led by clergy or a celebrant, or even a family member or friend could act as a Master of Ceremony. The service often includes music and remembrances, selected readings or poems, and eulogies (often light-hearted) from family and friends. Slideshows with photos of the deceased with friends and loved ones are often on display, and provide a wonderful visual tribute that speaks to the celebration and reflection of the person’s life.
After the memorial service, many people choose to invite family and friends to a reception, where they can continue to celebrate their loved one’s life and share memories and stories over a meal or refreshments.